JimK:  What can we say about Wall*E that you haven’t already read?  Well, one or two things maybe.

SPOILER WARNINGS (added…sorry I forgot!)  SPOILER WARNINGS!

Quick summary for those who live under rocks: Wall*E is a Waste Allocation Load Lifter, Earth class.  He’s the last of a fleet of robots designed to clean up the mountains of trash covering the Earth.  Humanity just kept buying and building and disposing and one day the Earth just got full.  Towards the end, some rich folks took a pleasure cruise (read: lifeboat the hell out of here!) in the world’s first luxury space-liner.  They never came home.  The only things left on the planet after 700 years or so are WALL*E, a cockroach, Twinkies, and a whole lot of fucking garbage.

WALL*E goes about his business, making blocks out of piles of trash.  Over the centuries he’s become obsessed with certain aspects of humanity.  Lighters.  Rubik’s Cubes.  A hubcap.  A videotape of an old romantic musical.  Anything that catches his eye, he keeps.  Including the first green plant to sprout in 700+ years.  Along comes a ship one day and deposits EVE, an Extraterrestrial Vegetation Evaluator, and WALL*E is in love immediately.  He tries to impress her with his collection.  When he shows her the plant, she puts it inside her shell and shuts down.

Eventually a ship comes to collect EVE, WALL*E stows away (on the outside!) and we meet up with what is left of humanity. Humans are all too fat, lazy and slothful to do jack for themselves.  All these centuries of lowered gravity has reduced bone density and a life of non-stop consumerism from dusk till dawn has increased their mass.  Every need is attended to by automated helpers. 

EVE tries to deliver the plant according to her directive.  It is supposed to trigger a return to Earth, but the Autopilot doesn’t let that happen.  He’s following the last orders received by the President (Of the US and Buy-N-Large).  The Earth is toxic, don’t come home.

Struggle ensues.  Lessons are learned,  Heroes are made.  Happy endings all around.

JimK:  I so had to talk her into this.  And she griped daily about having to do it, too.  Ha!  I win.

JimK:  The bottom line with this movie is, it is one of the most adorable things you will ever watch.  It’s achingly, ridiculously, impossibly cute.  WALL*E is Charlie Chaplin for the first half hour, just silently roaming around doing his thing, a bit of a bumbler, given to hilariously cute pratfalls and a wonderful relationship with the only living thing on Earth, his friend the cockroach.  Watching him fall in love with EVE is touching, adorable and heart-warming.  Watching his single-minded devotion to her, which ultimately means helping her fulfill her directive, was the most romantic thing I have watched in ages.

If you don’t love this movie, then there is something broken inside you and I suggest you seek therapy immediately.

JimK:  At multiple times during the first half, I found myself thinking of WALL*E not only as Chaplin, but also as Johnny Depp in Benny & Joon and of course, RDJ as Chaplin himself.  Not just because of the mechanics of the comedic movements…but because of how they made me feel.  Somehow Pixar imbued this little robot with a soul.  I feel, like millions of other people who watched it, like I connected with him somehow.

JimK:  The second half does turn into an adventure/Stooges-style movie with lessons about duty, about fulfilling your destiny, about knowing when to say no and do things your own way…none of it is too over the top and none of it is anywhere near the level of “preachiness” I expected based on buzz.  Here is where I am going to slightly break a rule here at MOA.  That rule is “NO POLITICS.”

Unfortunately, we have to talk politics for just a second.  Most of the objections I have seen to this movie - the vociferous ones - are based on the idea that it is a somewhat Greenpeace-y, global-warming-is-gonna-kill-us-all movie that berates anyone who isn’t a granola-crunching hippie.  That is, in short, utter bullshit.  This movie is no more preachy than any other Disney classic.  Bambi was preachy.  Shit, Fantasia is preachy!  WALL*E preaches some really good, and really worthwhile, ideals without beating you in the face with them.  Love someone completely.  Clean up your room.  Do your duty, but do it with some flair and originality.  Once in a blue moon, the system needs bucking,  Pick your moments.

How are these bad messages, no matter what your politics are?  I put it to the world; if your panties are in a bunch over this movie, then you are dead inside and should never, EVER talk to people.  You should sit in a room, alone, and complain at your walls because you have some serious problems.  Humanity didn’t destroy the earth because we created greenhouse gas or ate meat or drove Hummers.  Humans made too much garbage.  Look at your curb next trash day.  Can you really tell me you feel comfortable with that pile?  Too. Much. Garbage.  On top of that, the humans in the movie looked to the robots to do everything for them.  They brushed people’s teeth, wiped their asses, everything.  So, in addition to the message that “Hey, maybe, if it’s not a huge deal, we could all create a little less garbage?” we also got the message that you cannot and should not look to someone else to fulfill your every need, want and desire.  Complacency and survival alone are not the same as being alive.

These are all great messages that I hope we all agree should be taught to our children.  Hell, to most of our adults as well.  And that’s me off my soapbox.

JimK:  If I could give it twenty stars I would.  Needless to say, five stars from me with a “If you don’t see this movie, JimK might come to your house and slap you in the mouth” recommendation.   Everyone should go and enjoy this magical, mesmerizing and romantic movie about a plucky little robot and his sexy girlfriend who save the world.  I think you’re right, Donna, this is one of those special movies that will live on and on and on.

One other thing: We both loved that Pixar gave us a short before the feature started.  MORE OF THAT PLEASE!  I wish we always had a little short, even before live action movies.  How great would it be to see a whole industry of little 5-7 minute movies in theaters?  Get on that, Hollywood.